Our steed for this journeyman tour
around the four inns of the Ribble Valley Group is a Range Rover
Vogue, Land Rover's top model. The collection point is Hillendale
Land Rover in Nelson, Lancashire, where enthusiastic and courteous
staff are immediately keen to show off their well-regarded V8.
On initial acquaintance, the thing that
is most likely to strike the uninitiated is the sheer size of Land
Rover's flagship. It's not something that hits home until you are
stood side-by-side with it and have the opportunity to fully absorb
its mass. The menacing profile is heightened considerably by the
Santorini Black finish of this car. It dwarfs other 4x4s and
literally towers above mere passenger cars. You look down
upon vehicles which you had previously thought were vast, but which
barely reach the Vogue's window line.
The cabin is simply one of the most
stylish and well executed interiors available in any car today.
Range Rover occupants are cocooned in a luxurious bubble which the
detractors of modern motoring are unable to penetrate. Gone are the
plain dash and wood trim of questionable taste. Now, beautifully
stitched leather mates with a pleasingly modern internal
architecture. It is a wonderful place to be and there is nothing to
interfere with the comfort of either driver or passenger. It is a
truly welcoming environment.
So too is our primary destination. The
first stop on the Ribble Valley Inns tour is The Bull at Broughton,
in North Yorkshire. The Bull is renown for its menu, which was
created by Michelin Star chef, Nigel Howarth. Howarth is famous for
his novel take on traditional dishes, and The Bull continue to buy
quality ingredients from local farmers. Unfortunately, there is no
time to sample its culinary delights today. It is still early, but
there is much ground to cover.
When driving through unfamiliar
territory it is all too easy to blindly follow the Satnav. This will
occasionally introduce you to Yorkshire's odd narrow path through
compact village centres. Suddenly, the Vogue's inconceivable mass
comes into play. Through tight gaps and blind turnings, the
realisation of piloting someone else's brand new £70,000 car is made
frighteningly real. Fortunately, a plethora of cameras are at hand
to assist in ensuring that insurance claim documents are banished
from one's lingering doubt. Cameras either side look both ways at
junctions, and downwards-facing lenses show you how close you are to
kerbs and obstacles.
We turn around and head back to
Lancashire, and a stop-off at The Highwayman. This 18th
century coaching inn is steeped in mystique, and was reputed to be a
popular haunt for notorious highway robbers in days gone by. I
wonder what they'd make of our dark rogue. The Ribble Valley
property has just undergone extensive refurbishment, and remains a
favourite of local drinkers, who enjoy its unique atmosphere and
elevated location. It offers a pleasant break on the tour.
Not that the drive has been any kind of
chore. The Range Rover is such an easy car to drive that at times
you feel that your presence is almost not required. The gearbox is
automatic, but so too are the remote locking, Satnav, climate control
and parking radar. This leaves the driver to focus on staying ahead
of the North West's occasionally ill-behaved storm fronts. Weather
conditions are nary a worry for a vehicle designed to deal with
conditions a thousand times more testing that this though. Not even
the borough's most vicious potholes are enough to send anything more
than a negligible shiver through the frame.
The enjoyment of piloting such an
imposing and genuinely indomitable machine will be enough for some,
but there are plenty of toys to keep the passengers entertained also.
Although front seat occupants share a single display screen, it has
a two-way layer, so the driver can view the Satnav whilst the
passenger can watch television or a DVD. All seats in the car have
independent climate control, and the electric seats offer unlimited
adjustment.
The weather is beginning to turn, and
The Clog and Billycock is becoming an attractive proposition. The
village of Pleasington is aptly named, and has long been a credit to
Lancashire. The Clog itself is known locally for its excellent
Sunday roast, and you owe it to yourself to drop by this unique rural
inn. Time affords us the luxury of a quick drink before returning to
the Vogue, which sits in the car park with the quiet dignity of an
elephant. Once on the road, the high-sided drops of North Yorkshire
have given way to more lateral vistas, and we are moving quickly now.
Perhaps this level of luxury and
unconquerable progress is to be expected. The engine is vocal but
offers effortless push. What comes as a shock is the remarkably kind
fuel consumption of the 3.7-litre diesel. The twin-turbo actually
managed the whole jaunt on £30 of fuel, and returned to base with 66
miles to spare.
The final stop on the Ribble tour is an
amazing coaching house called The Three Fishes. It nestles elegantly
above the River Ribble in a nook which Victorian writer William
Howitt once declared to be the most perfect in the world. The
spotted chipolata and mustard side is a must-try, and the
staff will ensure you enjoy your stay. Time is marching on, and
unfortunately our astonishing Vogue must be returned. It is a car
with which one very quickly forms an attachment.
Still, Land Rover's exercise in
conspicuous consumption is unlikely to appeal to environmentalists or
down-sizers, or be popular with folk who are unlikely ever to afford
such an unashamed indulgence. In this respect, the driver feels
quite prone when navigating the less pretty areas of Lancashire. But
it is not enough to wipe the smile from the driver's visage. Any
palpable envy broadcast by passers-by is soon forgotten, leaving only
the glowing feeling of gratitude for which the Vogue so effortlessly
affords the pilot. The Ribble Valley inns form points on an exciting
round trip, and there is no finer choice of vehicle with which to
travel this timeless route.
